Lagos

There is no wind for whispers; just the silence of the sea.

As the waves lap at my feet, I soundlessly weep at the solace the sun has given my soul.

At last, I am whole, together with the sand from which my form was span

And the salt that seasons my tears.

After so much time alone, I’m finally home to a place I’ve never been.

I long to see that blue sea once again.

Lagos, Portugal

My Name

I don’t need you to call my name to summon me from the depths of hell

In blue-black flames I listlessly dwell, wide awake just for the sake of staying warm.

Remember, December is never far away, and yet it’s been ages since I’ve seen the languid drift of snow

It melted away with all I used to know of your voice, your escape, your sordid show.

I don’t need you to call my name to douse the flames of hell

I’ve come to know them very well, more than your deceitful, demonic spell.

The dark place where you dragged my soul is only a curse if I make it so

I’ve come to peace with death and darkness, with hate and pain and years alone.

Instead, I watch in the glimmering lights as my shadow pirouettes across the floor

Light as a feather, dead as the earth, joyous as the sun, lovely as the moon

Glowing with the fierceness of the sun at noon, I delight in that I won’t hear your voice call

My heart became a rainbow after an endless tear fall

My name is not for your lips; it is for my final and joyous withdrawal.

Drought

She wanted to cry, but no one would let her

Her sighs drew out a single letter

The drought grew long as she held her tears

It hadn’t rained for several years

She wanted to scream but no one could hear her

The thunderous rumble quaked wildly within her

If she could let go of all of her tears

It could rain in the desert the first time in years

Your Shadow

He screamed at a shadow to get out of his way.

Perplexed, she said “Why shout when you could walk right through me?”

He shrugged. “I want to be heard as much as you want to be seen. Now we’re both satisfied.”

So she remained by his side forever to dance before his eyes, and he whispered his dreams to her in the dark.

I Believe

More than any other color, I believe in blue

The widest outstretched arms I’ve ever seen above and below the moon

In bright pastel or tempest grey, she always builds a day anew

With hope of sun or fear of pouring rain, my prayers may still come true

If I were to pick a religion, I believe it would be you

You, the watcher who hides away and watches from a brighter view

The invisible smile of a stranger that I picture in my dreams

I ponder on how you’ll never know how much your unseen smile means to me

More than any time, I believe in midnight

The one second on the clock that an erroneous day is blown away

A flitter of hope in a shivering heart beat leaps awake

Ready to make right this fresh new day

Yes, I believe in this the way I believe in virgin snow

That quietly covers our footsteps and holds our secret close

She wistfully shifts around our frozen trails

And slows the time just enough for us to observe the small details

I suppose it’s hard to not believe in God;

Who else can I find to blame the hardships of life on?

Or where do my prayers go after they fall as weary tears?

What idol can I rely on to placate all of my fears?

But no one can reply to all of the questions, all of the demands

They fall back into the frail fingers of my tired hands

So I believe in magic, the magic that makes up time

Who meticulously grooms the sea and the sky

Patiently healing wounds and removing the iron ball and chain

So the hope in my heart can finally fly.

Messages You Will Never Read

I’m only sometimes sober when I write you messages you’ll never read;

Silly thoughts and forbidden words that bring me solace you’ll never see

I hide away from terrifying truths for fear of what you’ll think of me

I lie to you, and to myself too – the truth is such an ugly thing

I wear a mask of several layers, just in case you can see through

I wander round earth’s many corners just to stay away from you

And still I circumnavigate the globe to watch you from afar

I’ve known you only in concept; I have no idea who you are

Like religion, I see you only how I would need you to be

But you’re more of a demon than an angel in reality

But that doesn’t discourage me from heathen thoughts or sorcery

I’m closer to hell than heaven, and all you’ve done is encourage me

But not enough, not quite enough to send these messages you’ll never read.